Tuesday, September 11, 2007

Absurd Autism Treatment # 3: Thought Screen Helmet

Ever heard of the term "tinfoil hat"? I'm pretty sure this is where it comes from.

The thought screen helmet stops aliens from abducting humans. It's a tested device that works.

So how does it work?

The thought screen helmet blocks telepathic communication between aliens and humans. An abductee who took voltage readings from a second helmet while wearing another one demonstrates that this communication is a form of electromagnetic energy.

Aliens cannot immobilize people wearing thought screens nor can they control their minds or communicate with them using their telepathy. When aliens can't communicate or control humans, they do not take them.

An how do they know it works? Testimonials, what else.

The thought screen helmet has effectively stopped several types of aliens from abducting or controlling humans. Only two failures from standard thought screen helmets have been reported since 1998. A third failure in 2005 was from a cloth helmet with a smaller square area of Velostat and a Velcro strap which was easily removed by an alien hybrid.

The link of this claptrap to autism was first revealed by a reader over at Skeptico's blog. (One of my favorite blogs, BTW; incidentally, Skeptico has Asperger's). Over at stopabductions.com they have a list of "case histories" of thought screen helmets. One reads as follows.

December, 2000

The woman’s son, age 8, starting wearing a #3 helmet. Previous to the helmet he was diagnosed as autistic, had reoccurring nightmares of what he said were monsters, and told his mother that aliens told him to obey them. He has not been taken while wearing the helmet and his doctors report that his autism has improved markedly. However, he reported that he was abducted on his way to or from school. He had several unexplained marks on his body and told his mother that he had surgery. A neurologist who examined the boy said he has an abnormal EEG.

(source) (Emphasis mine)

Abnormal EEG? Wow. Surely, alien thought control ought to be causing that.


  1. I missed the following gem in the post. This was apparently posted by Michael Menkin himself in Skeptico's entry.

    As of Dec. 2005 a hat with velostat worn by autistic children has improved their performance markedly. Michael Menkin is seeking more autistic children in the Seattle, Washington area to try the hat. Some of the autistic children who improved after wearing the hat with velostat for over three months are not related to UFOs or any alien phenomenon.

    The researhc of Michael Menkin into alien abductions, with interview of several people with encounter experiences, was featured on KINGTV Evening News Program on November 16, 2005.

    Michael Menkin will answer any legitmate questions about autistic children and the use of a hat with velostat at mmenkin@hotmail.com.

    Thank you.

    Michael Menkin

  2. Bet his EEG is abnormal in the temporal lobe areas.

    I don't remember the stat and don't feel like wading through all the garbage to find it, but some obscene number of folks with 'abductions' actually have electrographic temporal lobe abnormalities, often to the point of epilepsy.

  3. It's great that those testimonials sound exactly like any you might read for noni juice, TD-DMPS, or any other quack autism treatment.

  4. Now that's taking the "stolen child" view of autism quite literally, isn't it? ;)

  5. Now that's taking the "stolen child" view of autism quite literally, isn't it? ;)

    Ok, I nominate reform_normal for the best reply of the day!


  6. Sooo...

    "However, he reported that he was abducted on his way to or from school. He had several unexplained marks on his body and told his mother that he had surgery."

    Was Mom told about his tardiness arriving at school? Or was he late arriving at home? I might understand the confusion about 'to or from' if the whole situation wasn't so laughable to begin with.

    Perhaps the #3 helmet was just a bit too tight, and when they removed it the rush of blood back into the brain sent him a bit 'off?'

  7. Michael Menkin9/19/2007 9:46 PM

    As of September 2007 several autistic children have improved by wearing hats with velostat. One girl is now in a normal school and doing well. Here brother has improved markedly and now excels in math. His mother wants me to put the children's records on a website. Another girl who could not speak began speaking after wearing the hat for three months. She is speaking better in 2007 and still wears a hat. If you have more questions please contact Michael Menkin at mmenkin@hotmail.com.

  8. Mr. Menkin: I've posted your message in a new blog entry here. Feel free to tell us more.

  9. I have a question for all of you bloggers discussing the Thought Screen Helmet: does any of you have a job?? You all seem to spend a great deal of time discussing absurd things here... Does anyone here have a life? A real one, that is? Outside this box? You keep discussing the same topics ad absurdum and ad nauseum...!!! Geez! Another question is, if what that man Menkin says, it's a hoax, how come the children who wore those weird hats all improved? I still haven't been given an explanation for that fact... or... are we all just showing off...("look at me mom, I'm so clever critisizing, aren't I...?")??? For God's sake...

  10. does any of you have a job??

    I have a job and a family, but get this, I'm also involved in activities that are separate from work and family. Interesting concept, isn't it?

    how come the children who wore those weird hats all improved? I still haven't been given an explanation for that fact

    I thought the explanation for that had been clearly given multiple times. If not, I'd suggest you simply google "secretin autism".

    Now, if you come up with something of note to contribute, do let us know.

  11. Good evening.

    First, I want you - "Joseph", whoever you are - to know that I wasn't referring to you in particular. I was referring to the whole "blog wolf pack" altogether, jumping on that Menkin guy without any hard evidence to prove he's wrong. I always find unfair to attack people without even knowing/proving if what they claim is true or not.

    By all means, if you or any of the other "enlightened" people who attack that Menkin guy - and there is a probability that his claims MIGHT be true - really find the alien abduction scenario amusing or silly or even sarcastic, I have an idea: why don't you or any of the "I'm-so-funny" people spend some time, say, a week or two, living with an alleged abductee or more, to see what happens? Wouldn't that be great? This way you could debunk once and for all the guy. Unless, of course, you're too coward to do so and what he says it's true. Then, you would have your "aliens-don't-abduct-people-it's just-a-hoax" experience for real... Go on, do it. After all, aliens don't exist! Abductions are the product of some people's illusions! You have nothing to lose, "Joseph". Come on. Do it. Be the first to debunk alien presence on our planet. Be a hero for the skeptics. I dare you to do it. All it takes, is to live in, with an alleged abductee just for two weeks to see what happens to you.

    Second, I do know what secretin - moreover, L-secretin - is. I am taking a MEng in Biotechnolgy Engineering. Secretin isn't consensual to everyone as a scientific hardcore explanation towards autism relief or cure. In fact, the complexity of biochemical interactions within the human body is such, that no one can accurately say that secretin is de facto the active player: it could interact as a co-factor towards other molecules in the body and that interaction could lead to the eventual relief system, not to mention the immune and MHC I and MHC II as key players in the process. It's standard procedure in our body with many molecules. We'll get back to this at a later time. Too busy now finishing my degree. Don't worry: I won't forget you or this conversation, then.

    Third, that "interesting concept" of yours, doesn't prove that the rest of world are just a bunch of moronic people and that you are the king of the hill. We ALL have other things to do besides family, work, love, travel, and, of course, internet and blogging, among many other things. But I do know that some people - not necessarly you - simply can't function socialy with others and spray their frustration over other people through blogs. Sometimes blogs serve the purposes of cowardly people, specially when it comes to cheap attacks on other people who just don't have the time to answer them back. THAT'S why I "spoke" about "too much free time".

    Fourth, I DO have many useful and constructive informations to give/share, specially regarding disorders of the brain since I'm in the Biotechnology field and at the cutting edge of molecular simulation of novel designed proteins to help brain disorder victims (Alzheimer, Parkinson, autism - protein conformational dynamics deviation variant and more). Someone else here, is at the front end of tissue regeneration and organ symmetry.

    But I don't think you deserve to know these.

    Yours trully,

    Luis Garcia

  12. Luis, the burden of proof is not on me. I'm in no way compelled to take any claims having to do with aliens or the paranormal seriously. Do you get that? If you believe they are true, it is up to you to provide evidence they are true. It is not up to me to disprove them.

    This is especially the case if you're making extraordinary claims. You will need extraordinary evidence, frankly.

    In the meanwhile, I can continue to point out how ridiculous and illogical these beliefs are, without having to endure any burdens whatsoever. I'm completely within my rights to do this.

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